There are no dating tips that are applicable to all women. These tips are different for women of different ages. The tips that can be used by a young woman in her twenties cannot be used by an older woman in her thirties or forties. However all women all aim to get their date right and to land themselves that perfect relationship.
Many sites give dating tips to young women in their twenties. Those in their thirties or forties however feel neglected, as there is is not that much information on how these women can date. It is for this reason that we found the need to carry out extensive research by interviewing renowned dating experts to give us information regarding dating tips for women in their thirties or forties. From these interviews, we compiled a list of 15 dating tips that can be used by women in their thirties or forties.
1. Identify the deal breakers
You should have an idea of those things that are repulsive to you and those that you cannot compromise. Some of these may include someone that loves a pet that you find intolerable, alcoholic or smoker a polygamist, etc. These factors should speak to you and tell you that you should move on to the next person because there is no way that it will work between you two. However, when identifying these deal breakers, go for those that focus on the personality and character of the person. Do not let financial strength and physical appearance become a deal breaker because you may miss getting to know the best person that you have ever met.
2. Be open
When dating in your twenties, you probably drew a line on some things that you would not settle for. Some of these things may include the fact that you will never date a divorced man or a man who already has children. Mills, a dating expert, however says that it is almost impossible to find a man who is in their forties who either is not a divorcee or has children. Ensure that you keep an open mind as these men may actually make great partners.
3. Be totally truthful
We talked with Dr. Jennifer Freed who is a psychotherapist who gave us great insights. She boldly stated that in as much as you want to leave an impression on the mind of your partner, you should not overdo it by talking falsely. It is important to note that when you start your relationship with honesty, trust is bound to grow. Once you begin your relationship on an untruthful ground, the rest of it will also be filled with lies and lack of honesty.
4. Do away with unfounded rules
There are rules that are no longer relevant now. Once you identify something that you want, pursue it without holding back. You should not let your love life be a game that you leave to chance. Therefore, some things like you should not call or text before three days should not govern you. A host of a popular show on iHeart Radio, Simon Marcel, states that you can call your date even if you were together just minutes ago. However, make sure that you do not over-call him because this may give him the wrong impression. Keep your calls short and honest and this may lead to the founding of an honest and long lasting relationship.
5. Look out for the warning signs
If you have a gut feeling that all is not well in your relationship, pay attention to that feeling. This is a feeling that may be aroused by suspicion such as when your partner is not being very truthful with you. This is clearly outlined by a dating expert, Mills. If he is hiding such matters as where he works or where he spends his day, then this should definitely be a warning sign. If you cannot get along on the first date, then it is best to call it off because it is not going to last long.
6. Identify your inner self
If you want to come out victorious in the modern dynamic dating world, then is important to know whom you really are. This is according to Dr. Nikki, who is a relationship coach. This can be achieved by ensuring that you build high levels of self-confidence. This will help you not to settle for less, as you will know what you really want and you will thus not be treated in a way that you would not want to be treated.
7. Be emotionally vulnerable
When you have been through past relationships that have caused you pain and heartache, you can build a wall that will ensure that you are no longer vulnerable. This should however not be the case. Let your past be your past ad do not let it define or affect your future. You can be vulnerable and decide to love someone else. As much as this can be a daunting task, it will give you the opportunity of meeting better people who will help you have a different view on relationships.
8. Do not drink too much
When you go on your first date, make sure that you do not take too much alcohol. This is because when you are drunk, you will most probably not make good decisions and it may end up repulsing the other person. On your first date, you should focus on connecting with your date and alcohol and drugs will not help you with this.
9. Do not pressure yourself
You should make sure that you have fun in your dating life. When you are dating, you should view this as a way that you can get to know and connect with new people. You will meet people that you will like and others that you will not like. When you go on a date with someone, you are not committed to that person. Therefore, when you end up not liking them, you can choose not to see them again without having to explain yourself. There are those people that you will meet and instantly have a first time connection. Make sure that in as much as you will start looking forward to spending your life with these people, have it in mind that you are not committed to them. Have a little fun while you get to know each other.
10. Put up some sexual boundaries
When a man wants to have sex with you, it does not necessarily mean that they like you. A man’s sexual desire has nothing to do with them being interested in you. He may only be after sex. This is according to a relationship expert, Goldstein. Make sure that you have boundaries when it comes to having sex when you are dating. Make sure that these boundaries are maintained and that you have a good reason for formulating them. Even when you may like someone too much and you do not want to lose him, sex is not a guarantee that he will stick with you.
11. Be confident to show your interest
There is a lot of advice that goes around telling women that they should not be open to letting a man know that they are interested in them. This is however misguided. As much as it may be fun to give him a little chase, make sure that you do not overdo it. When you continue to show him that you are not interested in him, he may end up losing interest in you. After you play a little hard to get, you can end the game by letting him know that you like him as well.
12. Be what you want to have
You should not leave the responsibility of making your date successful totally to the man. You should put in an effort as well. Make sure that you communicate clearly and engage with no distraction such as mobile phones. Do not engage in topics that will make things weird such as past relationships. Make sure that you pay attention to the details that he will give you about himself.
13. Do not seek perfection
You should have boundaries as well as a list of deal breakers that you cannot compromise. Nevertheless, you should not overdo this and put things on your list that are beyond reasonable means. Do not put things such as rich, handsome, tall, funny, etc. Let us face it! It is hard to find a man with all these characters. In as much as what you see externally will attract you to the person, look for inner traits that will make you love them more.
14. Have fun
When you are in your thirties and forties, you start worrying about the things that you have not accomplished. These may include getting married and having children. You can compare yourself to your friends who already have three or more children, are in a successful marriage, and feel like a failure. This may pressure you to settle down with just anyone. This may however cause you to make the greatest mistake of your life. Have fun while dating and settle for the one that you really like and the one with all the traits that you are looking for. Do not be under any pressure.
15. Stay true to yourself
Make sure that you are honest and confident in showing your date your true self. This is because when you show your real self and the person likes you, it will be more worthwhile than when someone likes the person that you are pretending to be. You should always know that there is someone somewhere who will be interested in the real you.
