I spoke to a young lady the other day who has really only done online dating. She broke my heart, and hopefully she breaks yours too.
She told me that she’s ugly. Fat. Unattractive. And single, of course… she doesn’t know what else to do, other than to try online dating. She said that she has done the best with her profile and photos that she can, but that she knows she isn’t desirable at all… yet she’s still hoping. She recently added this line to her profile, all in caps: “PLEASE STOP RATING ME AS NOT HOT. I KNOW I’M UGLY, PLEASE STOP TELLING ME THAT I AM.”
So….. did that break your heart too? I don’t get it.
I ask myself how people can be so cruel when I see horrible things in the news, or someone posts some disgusting (and I emphasize UNWELCOMED) video of child or animal abuse. But on a dating site? Why the need to judge others? People do that silently, in their head, already – why can’t it just stay there? OK, if you’re super hot, to have a million members of the opposite sex tell you that you’re hot is awesome. I get it. But what if you’re not? Do you really need to be told? To be rated? To consistently and constantly have your self-esteem crushed?
And what made these website/company owners decide this was something beneficial to ANYONE? We have a responsibility to all human-kind to be just that – KIND. In a world that’s constantly tearing people down, do you really think it’s of benefit to add to this when someone is at their most vulnerable, single and looking for love? Looking for acceptance?
Ugh. End of vent, I guess. Just do me favor – next time you are ready to push the “NOT HOT” button, think about how it would make you feel to have your self-doubt and perceived inadequacies shoved in your face by a complete stranger who has seen one photo of you. Don’t do it. Just don’t.
